


Healing

by inkmoth



Series: Moments [2]
Category: IT (Movies - Muschietti), IT - Stephen King
Genre: M/M, Trans Eddie Kaspbrak, fix it fic I guess, just some grown ass men healing with each other okay, theres some vague hints of nsfw but nothing too serious, they are 45 ish i guess, uhhhhhh eddie is trans and richie is a stoner
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-02
Updated: 2019-10-02
Packaged: 2020-11-22 04:30:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,507
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20868224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/inkmoth/pseuds/inkmoth
Summary: Richie has a nightmare that he can't escape from, Eddie helps him through it.





	Healing

Richie lets the blunt roll from between his fingers as he lets out a heavy sigh, smoke he just inhaled billowing to escape out of his mouth and he tilts his head back against the sofa cushions. God, He hated this sofa - It was an ugly green one that Eddie had wanted to keep for some fucking reason and Richie had gone along with it. He felt the dull heat of the half smoked blunt rise between his fingers from where it now sat on his chest, The ash crumbling down onto his shirt but luckily it wasn’t warm enough to cause any pain. He let out another sigh but this time no smoke came out with it, This was a sigh from deep within the depth of Richie’s soul. It was 3am, He was up for work in exactly two hours and twenty seven minutes but that didn’t matter, He’d still force himself to go in and be a zombie for the 12 hours he had to be there then he’d come home and have to repeat the cycle. Richie Tozier lived a thrilling life - Well, That wasn’t exactly untrue. It had been four years since he and the other losers had reconnected and finally defeated the thing that plagued their childhoods, Coming back to Derry had taken a mental toll on Richie but that was almost made up for with his re-connection with Eddie Kaspbrak who had been his childhood love since he knew what love was. After Eddie’s near death experience that was prevented purely by the fuel of Richie’s gay ass, The two of them had become closer than anything with Richie confessing his love almost as soon as Eddie came around in the ER - after three cardiac arrests. To which Richie himself had also gone into cardiac arrest at the stress of the situation. But eventually, Eddie Kaspbark pulled through and made a full recovery except from the deliberating ptsd. Eddie and Richie had decided to move out of Derry and into Portland - Then decided to share an apartment, then decided to get a dog and then finally decided to get married.

But despite the fact that this was four - nearly five - years ago Richie still found himself traumatised by that moment all thanks to the one recurring nightmare that woke him up every couple of weeks. Thankfully, He didn’t wake up in a screaming fit whenever this happened so he could very easily slip out of bed and go have a freak out in the bathroom or the living room of the apartment building that he shared with his husband. In the past few months, The nightmare was having more of a toll on Richie - Images of the day he thought Eddie had died in front of him running through his mind with a higher intensity than the day they happened. So he’d taken to sneaking into the living room, opening the large window with the sill covered in small pots of colourful flowers that Eddie had collected over the years. Most of them were wilting but a few grew up towards the sunlight and still grew because Eddie never gave up on them, much like how he never gave up on Richie. Richie had taken to a new method of dealing with these nightmares and that included laying on the ugly green sofa and smoking pot until he couldn’t feel anything and normally it worked - except for tonight. 

He lays on the sofa with his long lanky legs hanging over the armrest; His body clothed by a pair of superhero boxers he’d gotten for christmas and one of Eddie’s shirts. One arm lays on his chest while the other is tucked away behind his head and resting against one of the disgusting mustard coloured pillows Eddie thought went so well with the green sofa. Richie was in his mid 40’s but still found that pot was a good escape, It made him feel numb and far away. He lets out a sigh because his master plan hasn’t worked - He’s still tormented by images from that horrible day, the sounds ringing through his head and his chest swelling so full that he felt like he was going to sob. And he just might have - if it wasn’t for the small voice coming from their bedroom door.

“Chee?”

That name, That fucking name - The nickname that Eddie had made up for Richie one time and never let it drop. Richie made out like he hated but secretly he loved it; In any way Eddie could say it - Be it a comforting question like this or moaning it during their more intimate times. His eyes hover over to Eddie who is wearing pale green PJ bottoms with little foxes all over them and one of Richie’s shirts that depicted some kind of band from the 90’s. 

“Are you okay?” Eddie asks as he sleepily rubs his eyes, Richie feels blood run to his cheeks as he looks his husband in the eyes “Why are you up so late, Chee?”

Normally, Richie would stand right away and wrap his arms around Eddie - Pulling the smaller man close and giggling some dorky gay stuff in his ear but tonight Richie just looked down; Glasses sliding down his nose slightly and his curls falling to curtain his face. Something within Eddie instantly recognises this as a bad thing and all his emotional alarms are ringing in his head, Its almost like the realisation that something is wrong knocks him out of his sleepy state. He takes a few steps forward - bare feet sinking into the cream coloured shag carpeting that was also Eddie’s idea as he walks towards Richie. He turns in one motion on the balls of his feet and puts the back of his knees against the sofa cushion.

“Mind if I sit down?” Eddie asks, His hand lowering from rubbing his face and now falling to his side. Eddie’s hands find each other and begin some kind of nervous twirling; Richie notices this out of the corner of his eye. The taller man nods and swings his legs onto the floor and sits upright - The now burnt out blunt falling to the carpet. 

Almost like clockwork Eddie sits down but leaves a few spaces between them, He never knew how to take Richie when he was upset because it barely ever happened so obviously. Eddie was hysterical when he himself was sad and his husband always found ways of cheering him up or calming him down, Richie was such a mystery in that regard that Eddie didn’t even know where to start. The smaller man takes a deep breath and scoots closer to the other, Semi scoots at a time until his pj bottoms and Richie’s boxers are touching. Richie notices this and his brows raise slightly, His eyes fall on Eddie who is staring at the blunt on the carpet but Richie can tell he’s also somehow looking at him through his third eye or something. Richie brings one of his hands down and places it facing upwards with his fingers open on the knee that touches Eddie and - again almost like clockwork - Eddie’s hand moves to meet it and the two interlock their fingers. They sit in silence for a good few minutes the only sounds filling their apartment are the sound of a ticking clock, a dripping tap and the muffled portland street life outside.

“Did you have that nightmare again, Rich?” Eddie asks almost to no one.

Richie’s head snaps up, His curls bouncing back upwards as he does so. His eyes wander around for some explanation of how Eddie knows this and so they gaze at his husband - A wild mix of sad, confused and curious. Eddie looks back at him too, feeling his heart ache at how close to tears his partner was - It was so unlike the goofy stoner Richie normally is. Richie’s mouth hangs open and a few I sounds roll out of his mouth but he seems too caught up in his emotions to be able to correctly spit out any words. 

“I hear you crying in your sleep, whispering my name and about how you feel like you’d let me down” Eddie says as his eyes turning away from Richie to look back at the floor “And I hear how you yell my name, Like you’re back in that horrible awful moment and you seem so trapped” 

Eddie’s hand becomes tighter around Richie’s as he continues to talk, Richie notices that the smaller man is slowly beginning to shake - Eddie was always a very emotional person. Almost robotically, Eddie’s heads moves upward to face Richie and looks him right in the eyes - Grip on his hand tightening even more.

“I’m here for you, Richie” He starts, His voice cracking slightly “I’m here and I’m alive, I want to help you out - Like you always help me” Eddie seems to force the sob back into his throat this time instead of breaking out in tears like he normally does, Richie finds it almost admirable “Let me in, Rich - I want to help” 

Richie looks at his husband for a few seconds, Taking in everything as he does; Eddie’s messy bedhead, the water starting to form in the brim of his eyes and the passion behind them. Richie still doesn’t speak but instead decides to act physically - He moves towards Eddie until their chests are pressed together and he wraps his long slender arms around his partner, He pulls Eddie up onto his lap as if he was made of feathers and then continues to hide his face within the crook of Eddie’s neck. Eddie is startled but not overly surprised, Once you got to know Richie he was a very affectionate person so this wasn’t so much of a surprise and he likes the feel of Richie’s stubble against the skin of his neck - Eddie was awful at growing facial hair. 

It takes a few seconds of the same silence as earlier until the noise of Richie sobbing finally makes it to Eddie’s ears, He feels the warm wet tears seep from behind Richie’s glasses as they roll down his cheek and make contact with Eddie’s neck. Eddie’s hand moves up and finds its place in Richie’s hair, delicately patting the taller man’s hair - but making sure to avoid Richie’s ever growing bald spot that he’s so self conscious about. 

“I’m sorry -” Richie mumbles into Eddie’s neck through a sob, His voice hitching and breaking as he continues to talk “I have so many nightmares about not being able to save you” He pauses to take a deep haggard breath “And ones where I let the others drag me out of there without you”

Eddie’s lets a comforting coo leave his mouth as he slowly begins to rock back against Richie, His hand that is not on Richie’s hair managing to intertwine tightly with Richie’s other one as they sit together and Eddie lets his husband vent. After a few moments Richie takes his hand out of Eddie’s grasp and this causes a small panic in the other man before he feels both of Richie’s hands move towards the hem of his shirt and the panic seems to fade, Richie’s hands move beneath Eddie’s shirt - but not in a way of sexual exploration like they normally do. Richie’s fingers land on the lumpy scar that sits just above Eddie’s belly button and just below the two gender reassignment scars on his chest - This is the scar that Eddie got after that day after he spent days in the hospital.

“What are you doing?” Eddie asks with genuine curiosity in his voice as his own hands come up and cup around Richie’s wrists “You know I hate my scars, Richard”

Richie lets out a light laugh between his sobs and his breath bounces against Eddie’s neck causing the smaller man to shiver slightly, Richie always found it funny when Eddie used his full name. 

“I love your scars, Edward” Richie said back in the same tone as his husband. “Especially this one, Reminds me you’re still alive” He says as his fingertips trace the lumpy skin of the large scar, He had one on his back too but Richie only needed to see one to remind him that his husband was still alive within his arms.

Eddie retracts his hands from Richie’s wrists and brings one of them up to cup his husband’s face in his hand, Eddie cranes forwards and makes the two of their lips combine. Richie moves closer to his short husband and is able to make the kiss that bit deeper, His hands escaping from beneath Eddie’s shirt to land on the other man’s shoulders as he pushes deeper into the kiss - Chasing the taste of his husband, his soulmate as he does. The feeling of Eddie’s lips and the beat of the other man's heart against his is enough to remind Richie that his husband is in fact still alive and here with him. And that he loves him so fucking much. 

“I’m right here, Richie” Eddie says as he breaks the kiss apart but keeps their lips pressed against each others, Eddie can feel relief run through him when he feels Richie’s lips form a smile.

Without warning - and just like earlier - Richie’s hands move to around Eddie’s lap and he pulls him along the couch. Richie places his own legs back to where they once were and they drape over the edge of the armrest again because he is too tall to be contained onto the sofa. Eddie giggles and lifts his own legs up and tangles them within Richie’s, He shuffles himself up until he’s laying on Richie’s chest with his lips pressed against his husbands neck - He’s still cooing comforting things. Richie puts one arm around Eddie’s waist, His hand just slightly going under is shirt to keep his fingertips on the scar again while the other one interlocks with Eddie’s hand on his chest.

“Hey eds” Richie asks, sounding himself for the first time all night.

Eddie responds simply in a small purr that sounds vaguely like a “hmmm?”, It makes Richie laugh slightly and Eddie smiles as he feels his chest rise as he lets out the laughter. Richie places a small kiss on Eddie’s forehead before he continues to speak.

“Don’t leave me, okay?” Richie asks with a croak in his voice that is hard to conceal.

“Never” Eddie says simply as he lets himself sprawl out on Richie’s chest, Leaving gentle kisses on his husbands neck again hoping that it made him feel even a little better along side his words. 

“Promise?” Richie asks as his hold Eddie closer to him, feeling his eyelids become heavy and sleep begin to take him for the first time tonight. 

“Promise” Eddie whispers back in a sleepy voice that is almost like a lullaby to Richie’s ears as he feels himself fall into a sleep.


End file.
